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Tom Farber is either a genius or the latest example of the mounting challenges facing the American education system. I'm honestly not sure which.
Farber is a math teacher in San Diego, which doesn't make him an example of anything other than someone who knows how to pick a home where you don't have to worry about frostbite when you go out to get your mail. But Farber has started selling ads on his math tests. And that's where things get interesting.
According to CBS News, Farber sells one-line ads on the front pages of his tests to local businesses or to parents who want to wish their children luck. Ad costs range from $10 to $30, with the price rising in proportion to the seriousness of the test — from quizzes to final exams. The money he collects covers printing costs, which apparently are not part of the school's budget.
Maybe this shouldn't come as a surprise. Schools aren't exactly strangers to advertising. There are Pepsi machines in the halls and class ring vendors set up in the cafeteria. The average American teenager is a walking billboard for any number of products. But this seems different.
For one thing, it seems like a pretty questionable business move on the part of the advertisers. Is it really effective marketing to put your name in a spot where the people who see it are likely to be nervous and irritated? What's next? Trips to the principal sponsored by Travelocity? Detention brought to you by Immodium AD?
It seems like there should be some opportunities here for enterprising teens who have trouble remembering formulas. You know, this math test is brought to you by A2+B2=C2.
The sad fact is that as school budgets shrink costs get passed down the line. Farber told SignOnSanDiego.com the budget he gets for printing was cut to $300 for two semesters. Printing his quizzes and tests costs more than $500.
So maybe Farber is on to something. Maybe advertising is the answer. But why stop with tests? There are plenty of marketing opportunities in schools. Couldn't a landscaping company sponsor the school's grounds crew? A music store the school band? A chiropractor the desks?
Why shouldn't teachers dress like NASCAR drivers? It's biology class brought to you by the Discovery Channel.
But maybe that's too obvious. Today's teens are pretty savvy. They're not going to buy something just because it's on a patch across the back of their teacher's jacket. Maybe subtlety's the answer. Why ask story problems about trains leaving different stations at different times? Amtrak's never going to cough up the cash to make that profitable.
How about something like this: Jane and Jen just bought the same outfit. Jane paid full price at Burnsville Center — Open late for last-minute Holiday shopping! Plenty of convenient parking! — but Jen got hers for 25 percent off at Target — Expect more, pay less! If Jane spent $80 on her outfit, how many nasty rumors will they spread about each other when they both show up at school wearing the same thing?
See what I did there? That's what we call subliminal marketing.
So, which is it? Marketing genius or unsettling sign of the times? Or both?
"I think this is one in the same time a story of American ingenuity and a story of American tragedy," Public Education Network's Arnold Fege told CBS.
Maybe we'll never have a good answer.
Maybe we should all just have a Coke and a smile.